And You Think YOU Have Problems??

Spotted in Dave Morris's "In Your Corner" column, which runs in the Sun-Herald, a North Carolina newspaper:

Help get sneakers off power lines

A reader writes: "There are two sets of sneakers tied together and are over the power lines on our street. I called the County Department of Public Works and Florida Power and Light and was told that they could do nothing about this problem. I realize that both businesses are busy; however, I hate to drive down our street or have company come to our house while these unsightly items are in view. My husband and I would try to get them down; however, we just don't feel safe in doing it. I hope you can give me a solution to this problem."

Dear reader: Florida Power and Light should have responded, as they are the company that should be called with power-line issues. The County Department of Public Works manages public roads and bridges, as well as storm-water infrastructure.

I contacted FPL and the shoes will be removed from your neighborhood. There doesn't seem to be an answer as to why FPL was unresponsive to your call.

I will tell you why they were unresponsive. It's cause everyone at Florida Power and Light thinks that the reader should get a damn life and rather than feel embarrassed by the sneakers, should appreciate the youthful joy that eminates from all hanging kicks, which were elevated by their owners to a permanent place of honor and prominance.