Sunday, June 04, 2006

MTV Movie Awards

Well, apparently the MTV movie awards went down this past weekend. Looking through all the images at (where you can find credits for all images in this post), it's amazing how the same old faces show up at every damn award show. At this point, there needs to be an award show just to recognize award show attendees: "Biggest Swag Whore," "Consistently Worst Dressed," "Fakest Couple," and so on down the line.

For now anyway, here are my MTV Dos and Don'ts:


^^My-oh-my how the camera LOVES this man's face. And while I've never met the dude, there's something about his public persona that's attractive. Like I know him and Tiny aren't probably going to be together forever, but the fact that they've tried to keep it together as long as they have is sort of sweet. It makes me think the guy has a heart and isn't necessarily about having a very public relationship with the "hottest chick in the game."

^^Love the suit. TI is working that back-in-the-day Motown suave. Delish!

^^Oops! Another shot of TI! How'd that get in there??

^^Christina sparkles on the red carpet. I've always thought that some people do and look better when married. It's a case of creating a unit that is stronger than it's two components. Aguilera looks like marriage benefits her. I said the same about Kelis and Nas (see their wedding photo here) a while back. Who suffers as a result of marriage? Oh, Brittney and Whitney come to mind. And it's funny, sometimes one person suffers while the other seems to draw life force from her/his partner. Maybe an example of that would be Gwen Stefanie and her husband? (On a side note, how much funner would this game be if gay people could be married? It kinda sours the whole institution that two men or women who love each other can't share the same contract as a man and a woman.)

^^Though I have to admit, I've always rooted for Christina, married or otherwise, I like the girl coming...

^^...or going.

^^I've always liked Jiminy Cricket, too. I thought he was robbed of an Oscar for "Malcolm X," and here, while that slick grey suit isn't photographing well (and he's posture is as strange as ever), it probably looked hot in person and you gotta love his jazz-era, two-tone footwear.

^^I chose this image for Justin's pants. It's interesting to see that he chose not to wear denim. I'm seeing/sensing a move away from jeans and here's more evidence of it. As for this man's hotness factor, ehh, I wanna call him cute, but his underbite bugs me.

^^Many accuse Chewie of always looking a hot mess, but I say, fuck those haters, he's a natural! Love you Chew! However, I have to wonder, what's he doing chilling with the enemy? Was there another "Star Wars" episode that no one told me about?


^^This is an unfortunate look for LL. The chain is cute but the wifebeater tucked in under the see-through white tee makes him look like he's going for the sexy grandfather look. You can do better, Todd! I know you can!! (It goes without saying how OVER I am pairing anything with all-white Uptowns.)

^^I didn't watch the actual show, but if you got to WireImage and check out the sequence of shots featuring Colin Farrell and Jamie Foxx, it's hard not to miss the weird body language between the two of them. I can't figure out if it's cause Colin's in that insecure stage of recovery or that these two just can't stand each other, which doesn't surprise me given that I had heard that they did not get along that great during the filming of "Miami Vice."

^^It's funny, when an athletic great has a child, no one automatically assumes he or she will also enter the same field. The children of legendary athletes may be pushed in that direction, but history has show us that greatness is rarely passed from parent to child. And even when it is, the offspring of giants still have to try out for whatever team they play for. They have to exhibit a MIMIMUM level of talent. Which is probably why I can NEVER remember this actress's name. I know her Momma's name, it's Goldie Horn of course. Goldie isn't legendary, but in her day, she had a certain well-above average level of charm and charisma. But I can't think of her kid's name and that's because she's been foisted upon us. No try-outs for her. No sirree. Just because she's blonde, passingly pretty and the daughter of the bikini girl from "Laugh-In," we have to endure her awful acting and bland personality.

Okay, I just remembered her name. It's Kate Hudson. But that took a long time even for me.

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